Because of my excessive training schedule of late (which thankfully is about to let up), I've been rotating 3 different sizes of workout pants. My regular size 14's and what I thought were 2 12's but turned out one has a size 10 tag in them, and I didn't even notice! Last night I had to retire the 14's as they were practically falling off me, even one of the girls I train with mentioned how baggy they were in the bottom.
So I thought I'd run up to Tar-jay and grab an alternate pair, of course there's a bunch of new things and I always like to have a squizz and see what's on sale, and there I was walking through the aisles looking at some of the new pretty summer dresses that are already hitting the shelves, and this lightbulb went off in my head. For so many years I've looked at these clothes and wished I could wear these pretty things.... and in an overwhelming moment I realised I was no longer wishing, I could take the item right now and wear it.
These things still blow me away even now, not having to worry about hiring a snow suit, knowing I could borrow clothes from my sister and they'd fit fine, knowing I can wear all those pretty things I once wished I could wear.... ecstatic but just a little overwhelming as the moment of this reality that I have created with my efforts and hard work crashed in on me.
I spent so long being a wisher, a gonna, a settler..... it's such a shame sometimes I think to think of time that I have wasted, but in the end I know all those things led me here to know to this amazing achievement I have made, and all the goals I've hit and surpassed along the way. Once I've ticked off the City 2 Surf I'll be looking forward again to new and exciting goals, and very exciting future ahead for me to live and revel in.
I wish I could bottle this feeling and pass it on to some of you whom I know are struggling (or even to sniff myself on days I find it hard! :D) but I hope but trying to vocalise this moment that you too see it really is doable, it can be you, just keep going! I'll push if you want but you still have to put one foot in front of the other! ;D
Thanks for reading my lovely's happiness and joy to you all!